Friday, April 29, 2011

Baltic Beverage's Kalnapilis Lager


The pride of Lithuania! Or so their website claims. They keep talking as if there are millions of breweries in Lithuania and Kalnapilis is beating each million in every category ever. I mean how many breweries can there be in Lithuania? Well I checked and there's about four of them. Dare I say though, that this beer is, as Tourette's Guy would say, "Pretty Good".

It's a very light colored beer. It also smells like beer, ya know, beer? It isn't much to write home about but it goes down pretty smooth and also has an almost citrus taste to it. This brewery makes about 10 different beers, so I went with the original with an ABV of 5.0%. This was three bucks for a 500mL bottle and since their website is written in Lithuanian, it's hard to decipher, but I'm pretty sure it says something about drinking like a dozen of these and going to Taco Bell. You can translate it, but what fun is there in that?

If you drink enough of these boys you might start shaving your head and dressing like this. The bottle is pretty cool. It's green, ya know, and has a red triangle on it which I assume means Albert Foight, the founder, was a huge advocate of Zelda. He initially called it "Bergschlösschen" meaning "castle on the hill", but when he realized there wasn't a "ö" on his dingus laptop, he changed it to Kalnapilis, the Lithuanian equivalent of the original German name. Apparently this is the Lithuanian equivalent of Gatorade and may have promoted by Kurt Rambis.

Drinkability: 7/10
Taste: 5/10
Value: 5/10
Curb Appeal: 5/10

Overall: 5.5/10

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