Breckenridge Brewery's Vanilla Porter

Breckenridge is back again.

Actually, this is our first review of Breckenridge Brewery. I feel I've drinken (drunk? drank?) a zillion of their beers in my old age and it's only now that I review it? Well, quite frankly, I'm more surprised than you.

So Breckenridge started up in Colorado by a knightly man, Dick Squire; which coincidentally has the same name as the coolest guitar I've ever heard of. Picture this, some dude started a brewery in 1990 in Breckenridge. Not a glamorous story but probably the most factual thing you'll read on here. It expanded in '92 and 24 years later can be found in over half the states in America and are at a 62,000 barrel a year capacity. And that's good enough to get the attention of Anheuser and his friend, Busch, who recently purchased the micro (turned macro brew). I hate those guys. Don't have a reason but I suppose that unfortunately makes me a bigot and, let's face it, after a couple of these, that won't bother me any more.

Moving on. They make 28 beers over there (until A-B moves them to NYC; home of the worst worst salsa). Six of these beers are around all year round and the rest, believe it or not, aren't. Go figure. This beer, the Vanilla Porter, IS available all year. When it comes to beers, Vanilla Porter are as unique as a philly cheesesteak truck in the City of Brotherly Love. That means they are a dime a dozen but that no reason to not like them. Who likes unique beers beer anyway? Not A-B!

This beer is darker than Darth Vader's doodie hole in a cavern in on Pluto and smells twice as nice. It's also got a tan, thick head (like my ex-wife). The scent (other than the Pluto thing) is a chocolatey, sweet aroma. The taste is a thick, full bodied flavor, with strong chocolate and nutty undertone. The 5.0% ABV printed on the label contradicts the website's 5.4% proclamation. It's a proclamation abomination! I trust anything I find on a bottle (or at the bottom of) so I'm sticking with 5.0 unless Dick Squire's ghost shows up and tell me different. Also, I think he's still alive.

Well, let's face it, Breckenridge has sold itself to A-B so it's stock is going to drop faster than Beiber's drawers at a Hunger Games premiere. If you hang out at a local gathering looking for mad props from the honeys and homies rollin' up hard and strong with a sixer of this (which you can get for a 10 spot) bitches be like, "whaa" and the homies, well friend, you tell me what the homies say. Hint: they don't "play" that.

Drinkability: 7/10
Taste: 8/10
Value: 6/10
Curb Appeal: 5/10

Overall: 6.5/10

Atwater Brewery – Vanilla Java Porter

So, Atwater is located in Detroit so that’s about the only thing you can visit there in current times unless the Flint Tropics have a Megabowl goin on. They started up in 1997 and pride themselves on brewing lagers in such a traditional style that they import all their equipment and ingredients directly from Germany. On the other hand their specialty ales only use American hops so that’s where this one falls in line.

I’ve had a bunch of coffee/vanilla beers and some are just way to overpowering in flavors to really enjoy, but the guys at Atwater got this one right. It’s a smooth, dark and creamy porter, which surprisingly is very light on the body. It’s well balanced and very roasty but not a burnt roastyness you get with some porters. With that goin for it, the subtle hints of coffee and vanilla, and an ABV at 5.5%, I wouldn’t call this a session beer, but I could see myself pounding 3 or 4 of these without even noticing.

It would be great for an after meal treat and won’t get you beggin for a nap after.  I think this bad boy cost me $2.50 at my local bottle shop, so a really great deal for a specialty beer.

Drinkability: 7/10
Taste: 7/10
Value: 8/10
Curb Appeal: 7/10

Overall: 7.25/10

Berkshire Brewing Company's Drayman's Porter

First of all, do not confuse this with the Coffeehouse Porter.

BBC began with a chat with Chris Lalli and Gary Bogoff (who looks abnormally similar to "the Dude") when they said "Let's make beer ya dingus" in 1992. So they started a brewery in an old cigar factory in South Deerfield, MA. If the first thing you thought of when I said South Deerfield was Yankee Candle, you are two things; correct and as gay as Orlando Bloom. By 1994 these bros were in full swing. These guys got so popular so fast they had to add on more room 5 year later to keep with demand. In 2005, they actually were no longer a microbrewery and went to the status of regional brewery, as they ship out around half a million gallons a year to New England.

These guys make almost 20 different brews along with some liquor also.

This is their Drayman's Porter. A drayman is the driver of, like, a flatbed wagon, usually driven by horses as depicted on their bottles for the porter; the above picture is a generic growler. This brew has a blend of coffee and chocolate and unlike most porters, this has a very smooth operating system, like a Commadore 64. It is very full bodied and kicks like a mule at 6.2% ABV. The aroma is abnormally mild for a beer this flavorful; so don't let that distract you.

The IBU (International Bitterness Units) is a mere 36 so you know this baby won't leave you with a sour taste in your mouth. It's got a nice, dark head to it, like Magic Johnson, but don't pour this like some drunken hillbilly because it will foam up on you like a rabid Chiuaua in a graduated cylinder.

In short this beer is as legit as they come. It packs a punch like Soda Popinski and is economical at $9 a growler (.5 gallons); which is a little higher than a 6-pack and who doesn;t like to get drunk off of a jug? Next time your out buying candles, swing by BBC and do yourself a favor; get wasted drunk.


Other Berkshire Brewery Reviews:
Steel Rail Extra Pale Ale

Drinkability: 7/10

Taste: 9/10

Value: 6/10
Curb Appeal: 7/10

Overall: 7.25/10

Highland Brewing Company Oatmeal Porter

Oh Asheville, NC. I still want to visit you, because you are supposedly so pretty and awesome and have great bands, but your beer from Highland Brewing Company is now 0-for-2 with me. Click here for a previous review of HBC's Kashmir IPA.

This beer is an oatmeal porter. I've only been exposed to oatmeal stouts before, but in this case its an oatmeal porter. So it won't be as heavy and bitter and malty as a stout, its more like a porter. Which is why its called a porter. It is very black in color, similar to that of meconium, and has hints of chocolate and is a bit malty and nutty, due to the oatmeal name. The taste is very strong and long lasting, and would be nice to enjoy in the cold, not in the 95 degree heat like I stupidly did. At 5.8% ABV, its a little higher than average, and a six-pack runs about $9 or so.

This wasn't a terrible beer, I've definitely had worse, but I don't think I would pick it up again. HBC does offer 4 other beers, of which I've seen two around town, so I will have to give them a try too to try to up my overall HBC batting average. Hitting 0.290 might be great for baseball, but not in the world of beer tasting, my friends. And hitting 0.000, well that's just terrible in any walk of life. Unless it is your STD batting average, then that is perfect-o! 

Drinkability: 5/10
Taste: 6/10

Value: 5/10

Curb Appeal: 7/10

Overall: 5.75/10

Yuengling's Porter

I should mention I have a real problem with this label being red. I'm not sure why but I do.

Yuengling Brewery's information can be found on our Black and Tan page or the Lager page.

This beer is pretty good. The problem is that it's late May in New England so it's already hotter than her. The porter itself has strong tastes of coffee and cocoa. It's a medium heaviness of beer. I've had some heavier porters such as this, and lighter porters such as this. Yuengling charges a little more for the porter than their regular brews but it's a pretty good beer; for the winter. Drinking this is a summer is as smart as taking your sister to the prom. You can make your own Black & Tan by adding 60% Porter and 40% Yuengling Premium and 2% Butterscotch Ripple.

In short, this beer is pretty good. I like the Black and Tan better but this is a nice sipping beer that any midnight campfire can oblige. If you are in Pennsylvania, no other porter will do.

Drinkability: 7/10

Taste: 7/10

Value: 6/10
Curb Appeal: 4/10

Overall: 6.0/10


Other Yuengling Reviews:
Yuengling Light
Yuengling Lager
Yuengling Black and Tan
Yuengling Bock

Williams Brothers Brewery's Midnight Sun Dark Porter Ale

Williams Brothers Brewery is located in the New Alloa Brewery in Alloa, Scotland. It was started by Bruce and Scott Williams in 1992. They have about a dozen beers and the Midnight Sun Porter is the strongest at 5.6% ABV. This bottle first grabbed my eye because of the badass label; black, white, and reflective gold. You know if you see a guy drinking this not to mess with him. He's a loner Dottie, a rebel.

The beer has won a shitload of award for probably being really good. I didn't really read what they were because that is irrelevant in this review. The have a beer called the "Heather Ale" which was their first and flagship style beer at their brewery, initially called Heather Brewery. So long story short, some old lady came up to the Williams Brothers and said she has a rough beer recipe written in gaelic. She had claimed it came from the 17th century based off of some story. The story basically goes this Scottish King wanted a beer recipe to he captured a Pictish prince and beat the shit out of him in order to get it. The princes dad, Pictish king, was pissed and jumped off a cliff; reasonable. So if you want to believe that story, go ahead. Again, irrelevant.

Behind that badass exterior lies a fantastic beer. This porter is thicker than your average porter. The head has a strong, brown coloring than most and the beer has a aroma of thick accents of cocoa and coffee. The taste is similar but not as bitter as some other porters reviewed. They claim to add a little ginger to the mix but I don't taste it for one, and I hate ginger.

This is easily complimented with a chocolate chip cookie, as I am doing right now. I actually made a special trip to the kitchen to get one. You can't exactly slam a bunch of these in one sitting but it's a great beer to sip on...with cookies.

This beer is a pretty good bargain. It was $4 a bottle and that's about how much gasoline would cost to pick it up from Scotland yourself, give or take.

Drinkability: 6/10

Taste: 8/10

Value: 7/10
Curb Appeal: 8/10

Overall: 7.25/10

Eel River Brewing Company's Organic Porter

Eel River Brewing Company is the United States first Organic Brewery in the United States and hails from Fortuna, California. It started up in 1994 and since then they've expanded into a brewery and a bar and grille (has horseshoe pits), having to eventually move their brewery out of Fortuna and into Scotia, California. Since then, their output has doubled and supplies to over 20 States and Canada and Mexico. In Scotia, their brewery runs 100% on biomass renewable energy, has their own water treatment facility and, shit, even the leftover grains from their beer, they feed to their cows, which they slaughter for beef for their bar and grille. These guys are insane! Even their tap handles are made from 100% recycled materials, bought locally, and made with soy based ink. Hippies.

Their porter has an ABV of 5.8% and is a shitstorm of five different malts. The most prominent of those, such a most porters are cocoa and coffee. This actually has a little more combination than I like for a porter. It has a nice, rich taste that coats the mouth and throat with a chocolatey rainstorm of deliciousness but, for me, is a little too carbonated. It has a mild bitterness (like my ex-wife) but has a taste that makes me want to come back for more (unlike my ex-wife....and kids). I bought this double-deuce for $6 which is a little higher than I'd like to pay for 22oz bottle of hooch and the taste isn't really anything to write home about. The aroma is pretty good, a sweet scent, which you would think would be a little bitter given the taste of the beer. The smell exceeds the taste by far. Also, I think the label is pretty gay, like, in a bad way. It looks like something a 7th grader would design in his graphics arts class. The Eels River seal looks pretty cool though.

I respect the efforts of the brewery, that's for sure, but the beer's taste isn't anything too special. It's better than your run of the mill porters. But you can get a growler of something local or a Yuengling porter for less and a little more tasty. If I found 22oz's for under $4 I'd probably pick this up again; that being said it did ship to California to Massachusetts.

Drinkability: 6/10

Taste: 6/10

Value: 3/10
Curb Appeal: 4/10

Overall: 4.75/10

Duck-Rabbit Porter

Another solid beer from The Duck-Rabbit Craft Brewery in Farmville, NC. Information about the brewery (and their awesome flexibility) can be found here.

The porter from the DRCB is a pretty tasty porter. I enjoyed this beer on a stinky hot evening and I swear I thought I was drinking Gatorade, because my thirst was totally quenched. Very dark in color, the DRCB porter tastes a bit like coffee or chocolate, as any good porter would, but it had a crispness to it that was very satisfying. Like when you have a to-do list that has lots of things on it, then you finish one of those tasks, and you cross it off, and it feels really good. That kind of satisfying feeling, in liquid form. I slowly enjoyed this fine porter, but drank it quickly enough so that it was still cold. I bet it would taste like ass if it was even a wee bit warm. I don't think I would drink many of these in one night, but if I just got done playing a rough and tough basketball game, it would hit the spot (again, the ideal thirst quencher). Or it would be fun to drink a lot of these then try to play H-O-R-S-E with a women's basketball in someone's driveway. At 5.7% ABV, it's pretty average, and at ~$9-10 a six-pack, its a little pricey, but still worth it. All in all, if you want to be like Kevin Garnett or Peyton Manning, drink this porter. Anything is possible!

Drinkability: 6/10

Taste: 6/10

Value: 6/10
Curb Appeal: 6/10

Overall: 6.0/10

Anchor Brewing Company's Porter

I’d crank this while you read, your call though.

So Anchor Brewing Company is based out of San Francisco, the most masculine capital of all the states not counting Sacramento. Anchor Brewery only enforces my opinion that the best beers in the States come from California. That being said I don’t get into Green Flash or Stone Brewery but there are plenty of other fine Californian breweries and wineries. Anchor started during the gold rush in 1896 from a toothless 49’er named Gottlieb Brekle and later sold to Freddy Maytag, the founder of Maytag dishwashers, stoves, whatever Maytag makes. It doesn’t matter because I made that part up regardless. Actually, I just got scared that it might be true, but turns out this Maytag bought this brewery but also made a lot of Blue cheese and is actually considered the father of modern microbreweries, which means I want to shake this man’s dead old hand. Shit. He’s still alive. Well, I’m not gonna visit him! I picture him like the Big Lebowski, the millionaire. “His name’s Lebowski? That’s your name Dude.” I’m totally going to watch that movie now.

Anchor Brewery itself was in turmoil in the 60’s because of the hard sells of lighter beer for macrobreweries, which is why the ownership changed a zillion times. These cats also had a problem is cleanliness, which lead to an eventual non-uniformity of their booze, which caused them to close down back in the day, but don’t sweat it. Freddy moved them to a better place, so you’re still drinking ill shit (in a good way). Then these cats actually started making whiskey and gin, so it seems like everything was going good, right? Well, that old sack of bones sold Anchor for some ex-execs from Skyy in 2010. No reason to hate though.

Anchor has five main brews; 4 beers and a barleywine. The porter has an ABV of 5.63% and goes great with cookies. They also have 4 seasonal beers; Bock in the first 3 months, then, in order, Summer Beer, Humming Ale, and Christmas Ale. So between all the shit, you can find a handful of good beers from these guys at any time. I picked up this double-deuce for $4, which is better than a kick to the rear end you turkey. This brewery really pushes my hippy buttons with their all natural ingredients and their bullshit home-like care they put into their products but I’ll be damned if it isn’t delicious. But anyone that knows anything about beer respects Anchor. Showing up with a few bottles of Anchor is sure to boost you're street cred.

The beer itself was first brewed in 1972, later bottled and sold in 1974. The taste itself has a strong hint of toffee, coffee, moffee, loffee, and cocoa. As you can see, the beer itself is darker than Satan’s asshole and the head on it is darker than most beer reviewed on this blog. This stuff is tough. If you like dark beers, definitely try it out. What Anchor Steam does to ale, their porter does to porters. This is probably the best porter I’ve ever had. I’ve also had a tall scotch before this but trust me, if you love dark beers, try this out. It’s bitter, don’t get me wrong. Let’s put it this way; if you prefer Starbucks coffee over Dunkin Donuts…get this beer. This is, like all porters, not for chugging, but a delicious expression of Anchor's dark side. The force is strong with this one.<--This video is actually AMAZING!

Drinkability: 6/10

Taste : 8/10
Value: 7/10
Curb Appeal: 7/10

Overall: 7.0/10